Orange Goo in Alaska: NEW THEORY – BREAKING NEWS

By Geno McGahee

On the Alaskan coast, a bright orange material washed up and the scientists’ collective reaction was “WTF?”

The theory is that it’s algae, but this sort has not been seen before. “There doesn’t appear to be any evidence of a release of oil or hazardous substances at this time, but we are continuing to investigate and trying to get lab determinations on what exactly the material is,” Emanuel Hignutt, analytical chemistry manager told CNN News.

Samples of the matter were collected and sent to a lab in Anchorage for analysis. A witness, John Dinkins, came forward and noted that: “It was a big blob. I kept thinking of the movie THE BLOB when I saw it. Man, I haven’t seen this much ugly blob material since my last trip to Wal-Mart.”