{"id":78691,"date":"2019-02-25T12:00:22","date_gmt":"2019-02-25T18:00:22","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/?p=78691"},"modified":"2019-02-25T12:01:27","modified_gmt":"2019-02-25T18:01:27","slug":"doctor-curmudgeon-just-agree-and-sign","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/?p=78691","title":{"rendered":"Doctor Curmudgeon\u00ae Just Agree and Sign!"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>By Diane Batshaw Eisman, M.D. FAAFP<\/strong><\/p>\n

There are automatic updates.<\/p>\n

There are update notices.<\/p>\n

There are updates that I prefer to install manually (Just don’t ask! I am a troglodyte, as most of you know)<\/p>\n

There are new programs to be installed.<\/p>\n

All kinds of things to slap onto my already over loaded, over programmed, over app-ed computer.<\/p>\n

And each time, I am about to install something, there is that thousand and one page document.<\/p>\n

It daunts me.<\/p>\n

It annoys me.<\/p>\n

It upsets me.<\/p>\n

And, please don’t tell my wonderful attorney; I never read the darn things. (But I am certain that, knowing me, he has his suspicions).<\/p>\n

I don’t even scan them<\/p>\n

I just click “agree” and go on my merry, or often, not so merry way.<\/p>\n

These impossible documents, or EULAS, end user license agreements, are beyond my comprehension, beyond my patience to peruse, and way beyond my legal knowledge.<\/p>\n

If I sent each one to my attorney before I signed them, I’m sure he would groan, do a face slap and sigh very loudly<\/p>\n

And, yes, I have been told never, never, never to sign something without sending it to him first.
\nBut these abominations are different!<\/p>\n

I have never met anybody who has read them. I’m sure there must be people out there on this planet or some other planet, in this universe or an alternate universe- who actually read these idiocies, word, by word by word, by sentence, by paragraph, by the boring page after page.<\/p>\n

I just leave them to the innards of my computer to figure out. I know that, despite our sometimes difficult relationship, my computer really does the best it can and sincerely wants to help me.<\/p>\n

While I write this, a program is installing. But…no… as my fast and furious finger clicked on the “agree,” a phrase passed quickly by at the bottom of the agreement:<\/p>\n

I, the undersigned, do hereby agree to forfeit all chocolate, twenty five percent of my net income, all rights of ownership of my practice, and censorship of my writing….forever….to….<\/p>\n

Doctor Curmudgeon\u00ae is Diane Batshaw Eisman, M.D., a physician-satirist. This column originally appeared on SERMO, the leading global social network for doctors.<\/p>\n

SERMO www.sermo.com<\/a> \u201ctalk real world medicine\u201d<\/p>\n

[si-contact-form form=’2′]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Diane Batshaw Eisman, M.D. FAAFP There are automatic updates. There are update notices. There are updates that I prefer to install manually (Just don’t ask! I am a troglodyte, as most of you know) There are new programs to be installed.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[17984],"tags":[19717],"class_list":["post-78691","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-entertainment-news","tag-doctor-curmudgeon-just-agree-and-sign"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/78691","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=78691"}],"version-history":[{"count":-3,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/78691\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=78691"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=78691"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=78691"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}