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<\/a>By Donald \u201cBraveheart\u201dStewart<\/strong><\/p>\nMr Trump Takes a Test<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n It\u2019s midday in the not so Oval Office in the not so White House and Mr Trump is excited. He has been told that he has to take a test. I am so good at tests, he says to himself. He replies, yes you are, you are the best at taking the tests. He couldn\u2019t agree more, he says, nobody knows how to take a test better than me\u2026<\/p>\n Picture the scene\u2026<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n There is a group of people outside of the room having a discussion. They each have COVID-19 testing kits in their hands and are playing rock, paper, scissors to work out who will get the job of going in and testing the President. They have tried already to decide by who is the oldest, who is the youngest, who has grey eyes and who has three feet, but they still can\u2019t decide and they have been discussing it now for three hours.<\/p>\n One of the security detail, asks, \u201cShould it not be his doctor?\u201d<\/p>\n They all look at him like he is dumb. One of the people who is in the huddle says, \u201cYou mean the one who says he is really healthy and there is nothing wrong with him?\u201d<\/p>\n The one who asked the question suddenly feels like the dumbest man in the room. \u201cWow,\u201d he thinks. \u201cIs this what being Mr Trump actually feels like, like all the time?\u201d<\/p>\n At that, there is a door handle being squeezed and they all realize that the President is about to make an appearance. They all start to back away shoving each other to the front whispering to each other, \u201cyou do it.\u201d<\/p>\n Mr Trump looks at the group and his excitement rises. Realizing this he readjusts his pants to hide it and then asks, \u201cSo what do I have to do in this test?\u201d<\/p>\n One of his security detail \u2013 not the one who asked the question \u2013 is thrown forward and is now standing right in front of Mr Trump.<\/p>\n \u201cWell sir,\u201d he begins. \u201cYou know how Mr O\u2019Brien got sick?\u201d<\/p>\n Mr Trump looks at him trying to remember who Mr O\u2019Brien was. He thinks that every time he gets used to their faces they seem to change. He wonders how that happens and is starting to try and wonder when he realizes that the man who was in front of him a minute ago is talking again\u2026 Mr Trump stands up straight like his mother said he always ought and looks at this guy right in the eye. That\u2019s funny, he thinks, he used to have two eyes\u2026<\/p>\n He says, \u201cYes.\u201d He says it with such authority that the man steps back a little because he has been taken aback by the force of his response. He recovers, \u201cWell sir, we need to test everyone to see if they have this virus thing.\u201d<\/p>\n Mr Trump gets disappointed. He thought this was all done. He had seen the figures and his country was way ahead on the map. Surely, they could just stop doing all this nonsense? Surely now that the USA had the best figures, they would call it their victory and we could all go back to normal? Now they even wanted him to wear a mask. He realized that he quite likes wearing a mask. In fact, the last time he had worn one had been in that club that Jeffrey and that girl with the funny name had\u2026<\/p>\n \u201cSir? Sir? Sir? Are you alright sir?\u201d<\/p>\n Mr Trump stands up straight like his mother said he always ought and looked again at this guy right in the eye. That\u2019s funny, he thinks, I don\u2019t know why\u2026<\/p>\n \u201cYes?\u201d he says but with less authority than before.<\/p>\n \u201cSir, we need to take a test that will involve a swab.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cA what?\u201d<\/p>\n The man in front of him is now not able to explain what a swab is before a woman in a nurse\u2019s outfit steps forward. He thinks, where did she spring from?<\/p>\n There are a few people in the room who know exactly where she sprang from but none of them are going to say, as she addresses the President and says, \u201cSir, we need you to be better than the rest sir. The rest have taken the test and to be frank sir, may I be frank?\u201d<\/p>\n He thinks that her name can\u2019t be Frank, but she has such an air of authority he is not going to challenge her. He says, \u201cyes?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWe need the best sir. We need the man who can do this better than anyone sir. We need the man who knows more about testing than anyone else does, sir. I think that\u2019s you sir.<\/p>\n Mr Trump stands up straight like his mother said he always ought and looks at this woman square in the eye. \u201cI am that man!\u201d Mr Trump says.<\/p>\n \u201cI thought so sir,\u201d she continues. \u201cNow open up.\u201d Mr Trump looks confused and mumbles, \u201cIsn\u2019t that what you…\u201d She realizes what is happening. \u201cYour mouth sir,\u201d she clarifies quickly.<\/p>\n Mr Trump does so. She shoves the thing in, he gags and she takes it out. She salutes, turns to the crowd, puts the swab in the bag and says over her shoulder. \u201cI shall be back soon with sir\u2019s medication.\u201d<\/p>\n Oh, Mr Trump thinks. I like my medication. He is back in the not so Oval Office before anyone notices he is gone.<\/p>\n Later that day the results come in. Many are disappointed it was negative.<\/p>\n Whilst the author asserts his right to this as an almost original tale, any similarities to persons real or imagined are deliberate. However as there is little or no evidence that Mr Trump has ever used material by legendary Scottish comedian, Chic Murray when talking (especially about looking at the eyes and thinking there used to be two of them), as far as he is aware, this is clearly fictional and never actually happened.<\/p>\n The fact is that the national security advisor and one of the entourage refusing to wear a mask, Robert O\u2019Brien has tested positive for COVID-19. The White House has insisted there was \u201cno risk\u201d of the resident being infected. We just wondered how they knew.<\/p>\n [si-contact-form form=’2′]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" [AdSense-A] By Donald \u201cBraveheart\u201dStewart Mr Trump Takes a Test It\u2019s midday in the not so Oval Office in the not so White House and Mr Trump is excited. He has been told that he has to take a test. I am so good at tests, he says to himself. He replies, yes you are, you […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[17984],"tags":[22903],"class_list":["post-91098","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-entertainment-news","tag-the-test-donald-trump-is-hiding-from-the-world"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/91098","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=91098"}],"version-history":[{"count":-2,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/91098\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=91098"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=91098"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=91098"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n\u201cSir? Sir? Sir? Are you alright sir?\u201d<\/p>\n