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<\/a>By Bethany \u201cBST2\u201d Armstrong<\/strong><\/p>\nOne of the absolute buggers of having a traumatic past is that once you are safe, you get the pleasure of random memories of profoundly repressed trauma coming to the surface like the deepest of splinters, bursting through the skin with pain and puss. You learn to move with the dull ache whilst it heals but it is a grim reminder that pain is a necessary part of the human experience.<\/p>\n
I\u2019ve been safe \u2013 as safe as you can be with a maniac in the White House and racists afoot and a global pandemic \u2013 for 19 months. The memories aren\u2019t hurting quite so bad anymore. What\u2019s hurting now is covid trauma, teacher trauma, seasonal depression, and situational depression. I know I\u2019m not alone so I\u2019m going to pass on the advice that has been pulling me out of the dark space.<\/p>\n
The first is \u201cBe selfish for 5 minutes every day in a way that harms no one\u201d. Just do something that is 100% for you. Not for work, not for your family, not for your friends\u2026 just you. Every single day. Consistency is key.<\/p>\n
The next is make a list of the things you like about you. Everything from \u201cI like that I got a nose-ring mainly to spite my mother\u201d to \u201cI like that I love to swim\u201d and \u201cI like that I\u2019m good at role-playing\u201d to \u201cI like that I can make my significant other blush\u201d. Add to the list daily\u2026 nothing is too small or too big. If you can only think of one thing, start there. Add something every day. Post it somewhere where you can see it.<\/p>\n
Another is to indulge in sensory experiences. Take a cold shower or a hot bubble bath. Snuggle in your favorite blanket. Eat ice cream out of the tub. Light that expensive Yankee Candle you\u2019ve been saving for a special occasion\u2026 you are the special occasion.
\nFind something that makes you laugh or smile. Stand-up, memes, or a classic Adam Sandler film\u2026 whatever floats your boat. If you find that you can\u2019t laugh or smile, set a timer for five minutes and hold a fake smile on your face. Your brain doesn\u2019t know the difference. You may look creepy as hell but you\u2019ll feel a bit better afterwards.<\/p>\n
Acknowledge your feelings. Find a space that\u2019s safe to feel whatever you need to feel. (I have an affection for bathrooms) Name your emotions. Speak them out. Write them out. But mostly, feel them.<\/p>\n
For negative automatic thoughts \u2013 the bane of my existence \u2013 counter them with logic and truth. Ask yourself if the voice is saying something useful. If it\u2019s not, tell it to stop \u2013 literally. Speaking it out loud and repeating it in your head helps. If you\u2019re stuck, find someone who can reassure you that you are not the worst human to ever exist.<\/p>\n
Find a mantra. My darling Mama Janet turned me on to Ho\u2019oponopono which is a Hawaiian prayer. \u201cI am sorry. (Please) Forgive me. Thank you. I love you.\u201d It reminds me that I have to both love and forgive myself to heal. I\u2019ve also chanted my children\u2019s names and the humming sound I make when my man calls me Beautiful.<\/p>\n
Don\u2019t give up until you find your way through. It can be done. Until then, I\u2019ll see y\u2019all on the other side of the dark space.<\/p>\n
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[AdSense-A] By Bethany \u201cBST2\u201d Armstrong One of the absolute buggers of having a traumatic past is that once you are safe, you get the pleasure of random memories of profoundly repressed trauma coming to the surface like the deepest of splinters, bursting through the skin with pain and puss. You learn to move with the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[24479],"class_list":["post-97022","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-boxing-news","tag-depression-me"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/97022","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=97022"}],"version-history":[{"count":-3,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/97022\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=97022"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=97022"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ringsidereport.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=97022"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}