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TNA Impact Results: Kurt Angle, Chyna, Jeff Jarrett & More!

By Sean Farrell

So because I love how the IWC (internet wrestling community) is taking a liking to my coverage I figured I would share what is going to happen these next two weeks on TNA iMPACT…sorry they rebranded it’s now iMPACT! Wrestling…yes they are no longer TNA. Anyways here are the spoilers for 5/5 and 5/12 and can I say Chyna is looking pretty damn good physically so her vices have been treated apparently.

TNA iMPACT! SPOILERS for 5/5/11

Jesse Neal comes out in his USS Cole uniform with the entire TNA roster on the ramp. I didn’t get the specifics of the promo but I imagine it had to do with the killing of Osama Bin Laden. My correspondent is unsure if this will be included in this week’s show.

Immortal come out for a promo. Sting and Rob Van Dam hit the ring before a word can be spoken and a brawl ensues. Agents come down to break things up. Fortune comes out and Robert Roode gets on the mic and says he’s sick of Immortal. Roode says everything will change next week.

Backstage, Jeff Jarrett and Karen confront Velvet Sky in the shower.

Mexican America comes out for a Cinco de Mayo celebration. Hector Guerrero and Willie Urbina join in but the faction turns on Urbina, slurring his Puerto Rican background and begins to beat him down. Ink Inc. runs out and makes the save on Hernandez and Anarquia.
Ink Inc. clears the ring and Jesse Neal gets on the mic and tells Beer Money they are going to win the TNA Tag Team Championship.

1st Match

Bully Ray & Gunner vs. Christopher Daniels & AJ Styles ends in no contest when Tommy Dreamer comes out, turns heel and hits a piledriver on Styles.

Jeff Jarrett and Karen come out for an in-ring promo. They cal out Velvet Sky and a confrontation ensues. Winter and Angelina Love come out and join in. Kurt Angle comes out and gets on the mic and says he won’t do anything that will get them kicked off the network. It’s announced that Angle will team with Velvet Sky for a mixed handicap match against Winter, Angelina Love and Jarrett.

2nd Match

Rob Terry beat Murphy with a suplex power bomb.

3rd Match

Mickie James beat Miss Tessmacher to retain the TNA Knockout Women’s Championship. Mickie picked up the win after hitting a DDT. The match started well but fell apart. After the match, Madison Rayne and Tara come out and Madison challenges Mickie for a match for the title at Sacrifice. Mickie accepts with the stipulation if Madison loses her and Tara has to split and Tara is free.

4th Match

Sangrieto beat Suicide

5th Match

Kurt Angle & Velvet Sky beat Jeff Jarrett, Angelina Love & Winter. Angle and Velvet win the match and he announces that his mistress will be revealed next week on Impact to end the show.

Below are the complete taping result for the May 12th edition of TNA Impact courtesy of PWInsider:
The Jarretts come out and offer a truce to Kurt Angle as Jeff doesn’t want her to be put in harm’s way at the Sacrifice PPV on Sunday. The crowd is chanting for Angle. Karen says that Kurt’s been hurt too many times and now that’s made him believe that she’s out to get him. She says they have a restraining order out for his own well being and asks Angle to come out. Kurt comes out and says he can’t believe he stayed married to her. Angle announces a mixed tag match between himself & “his business partner” against the Jarretts for the PPV. He says that Jarrett knows who she is and she’s real, damn real.

*Mickie James & Miss Tessmacher defeated Madison Rayne & Tara.

*Beer Money cut a promo and pretty much intimate that they are waiting for Matt Hardy to call Jeff Hardy to face them at Sacrifice without using Jeff’s name. Matt comes out and says they showed guts when they dared call out Hulk Hogan, but they still make him sick and are worthless. Matt says he and Jeff Hardy were raised to be champions and he and his partner are going to take the belts at Sacrifice. But, his partner isn’t Jeff Hardy. Out comes, I swear to God, Chris Harris. It’s Harris and Hardy vs. Beer Money.

*Sangriento pinned Suicide.

*Eric Bischoff, Hulk Hogan and Ric Flair come out immediately after the match. Flair kicks Suicide low. Hogan says that he runs the show and he’s tired of waiting. He wants to know who is running games for the network right now or else. Out comes Mick Foley. Foley said that Hulk may have conned his way into the company and they might think that they were the smartest men in wrestling, but now things are going to start to unravel. He said that on 3/3, Jeff Hardy was the champ but then the Network saw what what happening and brought Sting back to TNA and now he’s the champion. Foley said that Hogan won’t be able to ruin this show and more because this show is called “Impact Wrestling” because it’s supposed to be about wrestling. He announces a Battle Royal to determine the number one contender to the TNA title and then says he’d like to introduce Kurt Angle’s partner at Sacrifice. A video appears, eventually spelling the word Chyna and she comes out on the stage with Foley. She got, seriously, a MONSTER pop. Everyone chanted her name.

*Crimson defeated Abyss and Samoa Joe. Abyss attacked Crimson and left him laying.

*They re-tape the ENTIRE segment with Mick Foley coming out to confront Immortal. Crowd was dead for this. There were a few small line changes, including Mick saying this show wasn’t “TNA” but “Impact Wrestling” so there’s the marketing stuff you guys wrote about last week or so.

*Mr. Anderson wins the Battle Royal. Chyna ran out and tossed out Jarrett. She went after Karen but Jeff saved her and they ran away. Dreamer got tossed by Bully Ray even though they are now partners. Steiner and Morgan eliminated each other. Hardy and Beer Money eliminated each other. In the end, Anderson tossed Ray out

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