Xbox One, Playstation 4, Wii U….NO, NO, NO – It’s Streets of Rage – VIDEO GAME REVIEW

By Georgie “Justin” Bieber (AKA – Joystick Georgie)

I was going through my closet today, now that I’m officially back home and found a box with plenty of dust. I wiped off the dust and opened the box and it was my Sega Genesis system! OMG! YA HEARD! As you know, I became “Joystick Georgie” in the 1970s, but have played video games steadily since.

This huge box of Genesis games called my name…so I called out for work at Target. It’s really funny because my LEGENDARY supervisor, Joanne, couldn’t get anyone to cover and now she has to deal with everyone by herself. Ja-ja, he-he, YA HEARD!

The first game that I played was STREETS OF RAGE, a side scroller, featuring three different fighters that you can pick from. You can be Adam, Axel or the female character, Blaze. Each character varies in abilities. Some are stronger. Some are quicker…you get the point.

I began with Adam, a former boxer, and a man handy with his fists. I once knew a guy good at fisting, but his hands were far too big. Ouch! Ja-ja, he-he. YA HEARD!

Now this game is very much like DOUBLE DRAGON, where you have to fight a bunch of goons and then fight a boss at the end of the level. I used to know two cross-dressing brothers and I called them “Double Drag Queen.” It was hilarious because they got mad about it and wanted to fight me, but they found out that nobody puts Georgie in the corner.

You go through the game, kicking ass and taking names, in hopes of meeting up with Mr. X. What’s cool about this game is that you can join the bad guy at the end instead of fighting him, but there are some tricks to it. If you are with a buddy and playing the 2 player, and you both accept the offer to join him, he will reward you by sending you back several levels. If one of you says yes and the other says no, then you fight each other. The game is AWESOME.

There were a couple of follow ups to this game and they were good too. I’m actually going to rub one of those out, I mean dust them, and give them a whack or two… The original was an awesome game if you like side scrolling fighting games like DOUBLE DRAGON. Sometimes, it gets repetitious and you may get bored as the same henchmen get thrown your way over and over again, but this is a game from 1991, and you can’t expect HALO. You have to go with the flow girls and have fun with it.

Let’s break it down…

JOYSTICK GEORGIE SAYS

Game Play – 4/5
Graphics – 3/5
Fun Factor – 3/5
Makes me say “Ya Heard” – Yes
Verdict: EPIC – Release the Dogs people! This is a fun game, especially if you play with a friend!

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