WWE Tough Enough: Review and Shocking Stone Cold Steve Austin Confession
By Geno McGahee
The debut of “Tough Enough,” a pro wrestling reality show where WWE hopefuls square off with the goal of becoming a superstar, was heavily influenced by today’s reality shows, especially Hell’s Kitchen.
We began in a huge house. The house has to be worth several million and probably in the range of 10 or more million, and all of the muscle bound wrestler wannabes along with the attractive female wrestler hopefuls gather and take the tour. It almost gives the impression that a pro wrestling contract leads to that lifestyle.
Booker T, Trish Stratus, and Bill DeMott join the host “Stone Cold” Steve Austin to guide, mentor, and put in place the contestants. Each contestant gets their own belt with the hope that they will be the only one to hold onto it. Once you are gone, you have to give the belt back.
DeMott is the heavy. He gives out nicknames to the contestants, calling one of them “skid mark,” and plays the tough guy role, although most contend he is a tough guy. He’s a fat guy that can do back flips from the top rope…I’d say that he’s tough. I’ve known fat guys that can barely make it off of the couch. They were not tough enough… that’s for sure!
A three minute test would decide who stays and who goes…and it involved running the ropes. The contestants would be judged on focus, how hard they hit the ropes, how well they ran, their timing, and their composure. One girl, Ariane, spent much too much time pulling up her pants. Thankfully, she was attractive. She wasn’t one of these large people that gladly expose their plumber’s crack for the world to see. She was a little bashful and Trish Stratus became very irritated. Stratus was never shy about showing her backside to the crowd and it made her quite popular.
Three contestants stood in the ring at the end, each with their belt in tow. Stone Cold entered through the large double doors, a trail of smoke following him. I guess it was for effect. I don’t think that he was burning something in the kitchen. Then again, Bill DeMott is a fat guy and may have been cooking something up and forgot it was on the stove. If so, they didn’t revisit it.
Ariane didn’t know wrestling. She noted her favorite match of all time was a recent females outing and Stone Cold became offended. When Ariane mentioned that she was concerned about her pants coming down, he quickly jumped in with a confession. When he was bodyslammed by Yokozuna, he “shit his pants” and continued on. I’m sure that Yokozuna would have preferred him to walk away and take the count out defeat. So, we now know that there are two cases of this. One, Stone Cold shit his pants against Yokozuna and Psycho Sid did against Hulk Hogan…and they both finished the match…troopers!
Think about it. If you were at work and crapped your pants, would you just sit there and continue to type away? No, you’d want to go home, but these are wrestlers and it takes guts, determination, and a pair of tights that are super absorbent to make it and Ariane just didn’t have it.
The belt was hanged up on her picture, much the same way that Gordon Ramsay does it with aprons on Hell’s Kitchen. Much of the show, the set up of it, reminds me of that show…and it’s not a bad basis. Hell’s Kitchen is incredibly successful.
In the end, WWE’s Tough Enough was interesting. I’m not sure if I will tune in again, but for what I saw, it was decent.