By Georgie “Justin” Bieber (AKA – Joystick Georgie)
OMG! I want the world to know that I called the Microsoft headquarters and asked to speak to that assclown, noodle dick, keyboard warrior twat, Don Mattrick, about the Xbox One and the crap that they are trying to impose on us gamers, but he never came to the phone. Really? Really? I’m not the sort of gamer that sits on his hands pal and if you’re willing to talk this smack about us gamers, you should be able to do it to me face to face. YA HEARD!
Part of the reason I wanted to speak to that FOOL was to put him on blast and release the dogs on him again. As you know, they changed some of the policies for the Xbox One after us gamers shoved it up his ass. I used to be a fan of Mattrick…that’s right…I used to be, but not anymore. He showed just what an assclown he can be and told us to buy an Xbox 360 if we didn’t want to hook up the Xbox One to the Internet at all times. Really? Really? Well, nice try fella, but you got put on blast!
I work at Target and I know that we will be carrying this system. I asked my LEGENDARY supervisor, Joanne, about it and she said: “Get back to your work. I’m not going to tell you again. You are not to be in electronics again and if I find you here, I swear that I will take one of those 56 inch television sets and shove it right up your toothless ass. Now go!” She didn’t have to say that about my teeth. I ain’t got no teeth!
So, the score is: Gamers 1, Mattrick the assclown 0.