Doctor Curmudgeon® The Brits Are Here! Hurray!
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By Diane Batshaw Eisman, M.D. FAAFP
There was a knock at my door.
It was a gentle knock.
The trepidation in that knock sounded alarm bells.
Usually, rapping at my closed door is done with confidence; nice legato sounds.
But these were tentative noises, almost uncomfortable with having to actually disturb my closed door.
Armageddon, our office manager/administrator and Keeper of Order, closed the door gently, pulled out my partner’s chair and seated herself, most gracefully, of course
“I want you to remember some of your conversations over the past few weeks,” she began,.
Doctor Curmudgeon® looked puzzled.
Sighing, Armageddon spoke “Well, last week, we were having a rare, quiet lunch, when you asked the server, ‘Where is the loo?'”
“So….responded Doctor Curmudgeon®. “What’s your point?”
“The poor sever had no idea what you meant and it’s a good thing that I interpreted for you and explained that you required directions to the ladies’ room.”
Doctor Curmudgeon® took the opportunity to twiddle her thumbs.
“And then, yesterday, you emerged from your office and announced to the rest of the staff: “I’m really knackered, and I’m glad it’s a quiet day.'”
After noting Doctor Curmudgeon®’s silence, Armageddon resumed, “Our staff does not speak British English, they assume that you will communicate with them in American English and they did not know that ‘knackered’ meant that you were very tired.”
“Ta,” said the small physician knowing that Armageddon would understand that she was saying, “Thank you.”
“And, my good doctor,” continued the administrator, “I have observed your frequent use of the word ‘bloody’ as a curse word. Please remember that we do have British patients who might find this swear word offensive.”
Doctor Curmudgeon® nodded her head and said, “Thanks for the chin wag.”
Calmly, Armageddon said, “I realize that your television fare consists of ‘Doc Martin, Jonathan Creek. Endeavor, Luther, Fawlty Towers, Foyles War, Midsomer Murders….and mostly British shows. But, I want you to realize that most people around us and in this office do speak American English. Although these British phrases are wonderful expressive phrases to use….am I making myself clear?”
“Bob’s Your Uncle!” acknowledged Doctor Curmudgeon®.
Doctor Curmudgeon® is Diane Batshaw Eisman, M.D., a physician-satirist. This column originally appeared on SERMO, the leading global social network for doctors.
SERMO www.sermo.com “talk real world medicine”
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