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The Truth About Witches!


By Janet Grace

When one thinks of the word “witch” in this day and era, does anyone think of Christian prayers, novenas, invocations, holy communion, good tidings to all, and harm none, be ye welcome?

No, of course not.

What comes to mind are the broomsticks, pointy hats, maggot eyes, green disfigured faces, long broken noses, tatters for sparse hair, evil, spells, devils and demons.

You can thank European Christianity, misogyny, lies for that. In order to take over a very promising corner of the market, it was mandatory to vilify people’s beliefs, which were mostly earth and nature based.

The ruthless went after the most powerful and the most powerful were usually those whose humble knowledge of healing herbs, medicinal properties, assisting with birthing babies made them the most sought after and most well known in the towns or villages or land.

No different than today’s events where Trump called Covid a dem hoax, back in wherever the hell time it was, Christians and all involved with the church were doing the exact same thing to all religions and cultures that weren’t theirs.

Nature based religions and beliefs were called hoaxes and those who believed it were in league with THEIR devil. We loved our devil, Pan. He is half man, half goat, a fictitious centaur who lovingly played his flute for all. Pan is where the word Panic comes from. That guy was one heck of a jokester but not demonic in the least, playful, yes. By the way. Warlock is not a male witch. Witch is a non gender name. Warlocks are those that are banned from covens for doing evil. Yes, there are idiots everywhere.

Loki, Pan’s Norwegian doppelganger, Thor’s brother, was a pain in the ass, but also, not demonic or as destructive as the fallen angel Christian’s had kicked to the curb and placed in charge of a place they called hell.

We didn’t have a devil or hell. We had Hades, the God of the Underworld. You know, that place where the mysteries are, hidden underneath it all. Perhaps he absconded with his niece, Persephone, who lived with him half the time giving us fall and spring, but it wasn’t all that. Folks were cool with it, understood he represented balance, as above, so below, but who gave us true evil were the Christians and their mess of a monotheistic God, who had a family fight, kicked the teens out of heaven and sent them to Hades, who said: “hell, no, they don’t belong here. They’re unbalanced. Get your own damned place.”

The shit hit the fan when the Christians, not getting anywhere with the people, began incorporating the people’s beliefs with their own, turning our eight sabbats into four seasons, recreating our beliefs to benefit their cause.

Beginning with Winter Solstice, December 21st, the longest night which in three days becomes the rebirth of the SUN on Dec 24th-25th. This became the birth of their favorite SON, JC, who was actually born in June, nowhere near December.

Imbolc, the return of spring, celebrated Feb 1st and 2nd became the Feast of St. Brigid.

Ostara, or Eostra, is an Anglo-Saxon Goddess. She represents the dawn. She’s a beautiful fairy goddess who protects and nurtures the tiny seedlings and plants pushing past the frost to bring us spring. She symbolizes new beginnings hence the painted easter eggs and bunnies, fawns and all newborn creatures. The Horned God, Pan is the symbol of happy times, joy and merriment. It became Easter. See? No devil.

I won’t go through them all, but you get the drift. The Christians had an agenda.

Let’s talk about those witchy faces. Imagine living in the 1600s as a single woman, helping women give birth, knowing what to do for a toothache in the middle of the night. Imagine you went to cure a man of a stomach flu after he had eaten rancid roasted roadkill. Imagine catching his eye with compassion in yours, whilst helping him out. Come on Mr. Man, throw up, you’ll feel better.

Imagine the next day, after Mr. Man feels better but he can’t get your kind eyes off his evil mind. His attraction was your doing. He wakes up with a hard on? Your fault. He doesn’t have one? Well, you cursed him, of course. If he said publicly what he was thinking, because he was a man, his word was valued twice what yours was. You would end up drowned or hanged for use of karnal [sic] knowledge. Yes, it would say F.U.C.K.D. on your tombstone and fucked, you were. Beaten beyond recognition, tortured, most of your luxurious hair ripped out from its roots, nose broken in four places or squashed, eyes blackened and then hung up and left until the stink was too much for the whole town to bear. That’s where the green faced witch emerged from. Of course it was green with gangrene, rot and death.

What is up with the pointy hat? The point symbolizes Divinity. It was worn in prayer and meditation to reach one with God. How evil, right? We are encouraged to make our own tools. My hat has two brooches. One was my mother’s, the other, my mother-in-law’s. The third is the tree of life which adorns the bottom.

Broomsticks? Personally, mine has a matchbox car attached and revs like a motorcycle when I press the button. Of course, it does. Broomsticks are the original sage. They represent the masculine, the stick and the feminine, the bristles. They were and still are used to cleanse an area before prayer and meditation. The saying is: “Sweep, sweep, I sweep this space. By the power of air, I cleanse this space”. Ooh, how horrible, using the divine energies of the planet to clean.

The flying? Simple. LSD, people. Witches of long ago knew how to mix the lime and the coconut with a few choice hallucinogens which would have them “flying” along with whatever ale was had. So, “boy, we sure were flying yesterday” may have been heard and misrepresented.

Cackling Witches? This part is true. OMG! THE PARTIES!! We laugh. We snort. We cackle. No regrets. Those that imbibe get high as fuck, but far from orgies. My coven is a sister, brother coven and we treat each other with the highest respect and punk each other out like any sibling would. Potluck and partying comes after prayer and meditation. The ice luge, more drinking than in the Christian hell, our parties end in singing “Roxanne” round the campfire with drunken musicians and witchy friends. If you’re too drunk to drive, you’re staying till you’re well. Text the boss when you get home, see you at the next shindig, Witchypoo.

400 plus years later, witches never were able to clear their names totally; however, thanks to education, many come to realize they were done a favor as it takes a strong person unafraid to say: “yeah, I’m one of those”, when one of those isn’t the coolest thing to be.

So, yeah, man. I’m one of those. You name it, I’ve been there and done it with this one, this one and that one. Don’t lie, you were there too. I am that which you loathe or misunderstand and here I stand with knowledge behind me and magick galore, green, no more.

2(?) days left until we hear that Joe Biden has won the Presidency. Get your candles, say your prayers, spell those spells. Hook n Nook, let’s have it happen.


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